These days I am in a strange new pattern of self-care, or rather, I am supposed to be learning to care for myself but it is so alien that I find myself really having to struggle to keep the ball rolling.
A couple of months ago I finally got well and truly sick, after flirting with it for years. Years of never taking care of myself, at all. Ever. Always caring for everyone else with no care for the carer. Add to that an entire lifetime of eating absolute crap. The SAD diet ("standard american diet") times 1,000.
There's a lot to say about all that, but it will keep for future posts! So a couple of months ago when I became remarkably ill and was facing probable surgery, a strange thing happened and I somehow ended up looking at a Chinese medicine clinic website and calling to make an appointment for the free consultation. Since then I've been seeing Dr. Sharon twice a week for acupuncture and herbs, and the experience has been amazing. This therapy is incredible! I would urge anyone with nearly any condition to consult with an acupuncture doctor to see if it can help them.
In the process I am having to learn self-care, on every level. Rest, and lots of it. Peaceful sleep. Less stress (and not just giving that lip service but truly finding ways not to get involved on a personal level in every single opportunity to flip out each day when stressful situations pop up; this is MUCH harder than it sounds). Eat the right foods every day, in the right amounts, at the right times. Don't eat the wrong foods! Work LESS. Meditate. Exercise daily, outside, in the appropriate way for your body. Hardest of all for me is remembering that just because I feel amazing does not mean that I can revert to the behaviors that got me here in the first place. My doctor tells me "save some for yourself", "what good is the money if you don't have time to enjoy the things it buys", "peaceful mind", "this is your time", and many other wonderful points of wisdom. Now the trick is to really do it, not just smile and nod and then race off in all directions at once.
This week I did just that, and got myself back into some minor trouble. Dr. Sharon fixed me up this afternoon and I will need to take particularly good care of myself this weekend, but all should be well soon. I realized that I am so very bad at caring for myself that I really need something in my life that helps me keep at it, some form of reminder, some means of transparency...and it hit me! I've been mulling over breathing new life into my blog, which was created in a fit of health consciousness a couple of years ago. What better way to chronicle my new path and in the process share my learnings about how to undo a lifetime of transgressions against the self. Hopefully we will discover amazing things together!
I've found acupuncture really helpful as well. AND it helped my DOG, who had been skeletal, to like to eat, as well as her limp from hip dysplasia.
ReplyDeleteKat, I feel more relaxed just having read this post! It's so true that we can make ourselves absolutely nuts stressing out about silly stuff--and there is so much silly, meaningless stuff. My aim is always to meditate more, but I stink at sitting still, so I'm practicing other forms of meditation, like walking meditations, or meditating on a candle flame. I can't wait to dig around this blog and find more inspiration for healthier living!
ReplyDeleteKat, I feel more relaxed just having read this post! It's so true that it's all too easy to stress out about meaningless stuff. My aim is always to meditate more, but I stink at sitting still, so I'm practicing other forms of meditation, like walking meditations, or meditating on a candle flame. I can't wait to dig around this blog and find more inspiration for healthier living!
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